Day One

Here I am again. Day One again. I must have seen a thousand Day Ones. I keep thinking that by my age, I should have figured this out by now. The problem is that life post-menopause brings a whole new set of rules. Rule number one is: excess weight is next to impossible to lose. The past couple years for me have been filled with a never-ending search to find the magic combination of diet, exercise, and cognitive examination.

One so-called expert will tell me to just eat the right foods. That will remove hunger pains by readjusting my hormones and the pounds will slip away. (I just need to hire a full-time cook to take care of that for me.) Another expert will drill into me that I just need to exercise, although the type or quantity of exercise is up for debate. Unfortunately, I can no longer keep up with the thirtysomething trainer on the DVD who’s knees and hips don’t crack and ache. And then, there are the experts who claim that if I just get rid of my emotional garbage and stop eating to fill emptiness (of some sort), I will eat only (only) when my body needs food to sustain itself and before long I will find myself at my “natural” weight.

I agree that at 5′ 4″ and 175 pounds, I need to lose weight. At this weight, I am just under the “obese” category. I have at times drifted into the “obese” category. Which is when I have a mental heart attack and get serious (serious) about losing weight. I am statistically at high risk for ill health. I’m real about that. But what really tells me I need to lose weight is not the statistics, but how I feel. I feel miserable in all areas weight related.

Even though I haven’t found that magic combination yet, I do have faith it’s out there and will keep searching for it. So here I am starting fresh. With a new attitude, a new determination and possibly a new magic combination.

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